…and this is where I am bound to (my inheritance): Matthew 25:24

If you want to know yours, check with the Author. He’s written the road map in the pages of The Bible.

2010 wasn’t exactly bad. In fact, this is by far the most wonderful year. The transition wasn’t easy at all. From leaving my previous job, broken relationships, going out of the country, restful months (the kind which I never had), inward conversion, etc.  Looking back, I realized all these things were not at all major setbacks but what happened was divinely arranged and beautifully timed.

Things didn’t happen as how I wanted it to be. Still, I keep it in my heart and in time I will have it. It shall not tarry. I believe all things work together for good and if I just put my trust upon the Lord no devil in hell and no man on earth can keep His promise away from me.

Yet, I’m not in the authority to judge them. I cannot cast the first stone. I was once like them. Short-sighted. Proud. Self-sufficient. Sinful. I did things I couldn’t imagine I am capable of. I realized that man is simply wicked. Iniquity is innate in everyone. Dwells in the deepest soul. Runs in the blood. Abides in the bones.

I was starting to climb the corporate ladder. I was doing well. Or so I thought. Honestly, I was very busy and very much empty. But God has better plans for me. Indeed, there are many plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails (Prov 19:21). After 26 years of anything goes, rash decisions, some level of self-sufficiency, brokenness… He allowed me to travel 4,351.95 miles to get my full attention and to know for what, why and Whom I am made for.  I was washed by the blood of Jesus and became a new creation. I say it is real, when you accept Jesus in your life… everything is new. When He works, it is an inward conversion and heart transformation. Not behavioral modification of human effort.

…….to be continued.

I walk… run… travel… Do numerous adventures. But I’m rooted helplessly on the spot more than I move around.

I always have something to say. I talk too much. But I mute when explaining myself, especially telling what I feel.

When I laugh, frown, smile, cry. Just take it as it is. It is all I could give anyway.
So don’t ask why, I’m sourced out of finding reasons.

I just turned Silver just when the world is welcoming the year 2009. I celebrated my birthday with my loved ones. I’m now half the age of my mum. It was actually a triple celebration – New Year, my birthday and my mum’s (hers was January 2).

I officially started my year today… working, of course, and I wanna start it right (ehem, I’ll try with all my might). So, for a start, I want to thank everybody who have been with me for the past year and the coming, as well. For all the greetings through texts, calls, emails, IMs, in person, etc. but most especially the LOVE and CARE which I hope I reciprocated. I pray for us all a beautiful and bountiful year ahead and for the coming years. God bless us all!

~rilag xoxo

Sa NCCC Mall Maa Gate / Waiting Shed pasado alas dos ng hapon while waiting for our ride.

dispatser: South Villa?! South Villa!?

Rilag/Chang: (Umiling lang)

dispatser: Naa pa oh… sibugi lang! Asa diay mo?

Rilag/Chang: Dili.

dispatser: Taxi mo miga…? Taxi!!! Taxi!!!

Rilag/Chang: Dili lagi mi.

dispatser: Bus mo? BUS???

Rilag/Chang: Dili lagi nong… Dumptruck lang mi (nahihiya at natatawa).

dispatser: Aww. dumptruck!?! (tawa)

Rilag/Chang: Yawa, lagi mo ay. Seryoso mi ba (Tumawa na lang rin, kahit nakakaramdam na ng hiya).

dispatser:kuyawa ninyo miga ui! (Sabay tawag sa dumaan na dumptruck na namumulaklak ng tao ang hauler).

Rilag/Chang: Dili pud daw na ui!

(After few minutes the behemoth arrived, pero hindi pa rin kami tinigilan ng dispatser)

dispatser: Oh kana! (Sabay kaway kay Nong Narding – ang drayber ng trak – habang tumatawa).

Rilag/Chang: Buang jud ka ay! Kaulaw ba.(Natatawa pa rin na naiinis na nahihiya.)

Ah basta, sumakay na lang kami bago pa mabasa ng ulan. Haaay, kataw-anan.

Lingaw kaayo akoang first ride sa dumptruck oi. Dako-dako diay ang harap, abi nako three-seater lang.
Ilang months na rin nabili ng kumpanya ang trak, and I’ve seen it many times (alangan). Ug kami staff sa office, na-amaze. Walo mi including the driver plus a kid nasakto tanan.

***unta nasabtan ninyo, ek! asar!

The Way by Fastball – by Seniors
Achy Breaky Heart by BillyRay Cyrus– by Junior Boys
***I find them cute though a bit awkward dancing this, especially my highschool crush… ek! Haha
Rockafeller Skank by Fatboy Slim – by Junior Girls
***I was part of this dance, and we were actually wearing gowns.

It was fun! …and my highschool years!

Napakalalim ng iniisip, wala man lang kakurap-kurap, I heard Sir Drew saying. I was so absorbed inside the bubble I created while others are partying – people eating, talking and laughing and children playing. An officemate then followed up saying not to think about it. If I’m not morena at all, surely I’ll blend with my blouse on that instant and people would’ve mistaken me as one of the pink balloons surrounding the place.

I can feel my ears and cheeks burning. I wonder how many minutes long I left the world. Did I miss a lot of fun happening around? I just wonder. A lot of things running inside my head and matters unsettling within my heart. And I quite believe whatever the issue is, it was not premeditated. I never saw it coming. But I felt an appropriate level of happiness.

I’m not so sure though if I’ll do something about it. It’s utterly complicated. I would bet big time that it won’t make things any better too. At least just for the time being. It’ll just distort lovely moments that was painted. And could be misconstrued by some.

Err, I honestly, I’m confused. Nah, I’ll figure it out. Might not be soon, but I will. My heart will lead me there. Then I should not apologize. Then I’ll thank thee. Then I can blink and smile even if I’m staring at oblivion.